1 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:28,509 Hello, and welcome to another edition of Up Close. 2 00:00:28,510 --> 00:00:31,400 We are coming to you from the beautiful 3 00:00:31,430 --> 00:00:34,250 3 Angels SDA Church in Wichita, Kansas. 4 00:00:34,290 --> 00:00:38,020 We're so pleased to have you and our live audience 5 00:00:38,050 --> 00:00:38,990 join us. 6 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:42,949 Today's program will center on one of the most pervasive 7 00:00:42,950 --> 00:00:46,500 problems of our generation: drug addiction. 8 00:00:46,700 --> 00:00:51,400 If I say "drug addict", what image pops up in your mind? 9 00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:55,019 Do you envision someone with scrambled brains who can 10 00:00:55,020 --> 00:00:59,820 no longer function normally? The problem is more widespread 11 00:00:59,920 --> 00:01:05,090 than most of us recognize. 73% of all drug use 12 00:01:05,130 --> 00:01:10,270 is practiced by those that we, benignly, label as 13 00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:14,600 "recreational" drug users. 14 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,109 These are people who go to work every day, 15 00:01:17,110 --> 00:01:21,520 some in their 3 piece suits, but their choice of recreation 16 00:01:21,550 --> 00:01:24,720 is funding the traffickers of the world. 17 00:01:25,020 --> 00:01:29,350 Addiction is a progressive disease, one that accelerates 18 00:01:29,390 --> 00:01:33,690 as brain neurochemicals become depleted by regular drug use. 19 00:01:33,890 --> 00:01:39,290 This degenerative disease leads the addict constantly chasing 20 00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:41,250 after the euphoric high. 21 00:01:41,450 --> 00:01:45,430 Addicts have an illusion and they live in this illusion. 22 00:01:45,540 --> 00:01:50,420 It's an illusion that is a total denial of truth, but it's time 23 00:01:50,450 --> 00:01:54,060 that we stopped looking at drugs as the main issue 24 00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:57,299 and we need to get to the bottom of the problem. 25 00:01:57,300 --> 00:02:01,280 Our first guest, Amanda Hultz, suffered physical 26 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:05,800 and sexual abuse from childhood at the hands of her father. 27 00:02:06,020 --> 00:02:09,590 His dirty secret was hidden for years, but finally 28 00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:14,390 unveiled when Amanda stood up at 16 years old to testify 29 00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:15,680 against him. 30 00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:19,529 Her father was imprisoned, but the dysfunction of the family 31 00:02:19,530 --> 00:02:22,500 was not healed. When her favorite aunt 32 00:02:22,700 --> 00:02:26,630 was killed in a car crash, Amanda felt as if the only 33 00:02:26,670 --> 00:02:30,860 positive, supporting pillar in her life had just given way, 34 00:02:31,060 --> 00:02:33,559 and her whole world came crashing down. 35 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:35,140 Listen to this: 36 00:02:35,970 --> 00:02:40,980 About a year, between 16 and 17, a friend of mine 37 00:02:41,020 --> 00:02:45,740 had a brother who was using methamphetamines and at first 38 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:50,410 we started smoking weed just for a week, and then 39 00:02:51,190 --> 00:02:55,600 he introduced methamphetamines to his sister, him and his drug 40 00:02:55,630 --> 00:02:56,960 dealer did. 41 00:02:57,250 --> 00:03:00,929 And so she introduced it to us, there were about 5 of us 42 00:03:00,930 --> 00:03:05,070 that were all friends, and she introduced the meths to us. 43 00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:10,439 In the beginning we would just do it on the weekends, 44 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,810 or we were just going to do it for recreation, 45 00:03:15,340 --> 00:03:17,909 it wasn't going to become a habit, it was no big deal, 46 00:03:17,910 --> 00:03:20,449 we weren't hurting anybody, that's what we kept saying 47 00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:21,700 to everyone. 48 00:03:21,740 --> 00:03:24,199 It's no big deal, nobody was getting hurt, 49 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,989 we were just trying to have a good time. 50 00:03:26,990 --> 00:03:30,989 I was half into testifying in court, all that kind of stuff. 51 00:03:30,990 --> 00:03:35,129 Well, if I went high, it wasn't the same as if I went sober. 52 00:03:35,130 --> 00:03:38,629 It didn't seem as big of a deal to me, so it helped with 53 00:03:38,630 --> 00:03:42,420 all that, I felt like it was drowning everything out. 54 00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:47,309 I didn't realize that slowly, I was being dragged into 55 00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:51,660 this world that was going to take me 7 years to get out of. 56 00:03:52,070 --> 00:03:55,239 Here she thought it was nothing much in her life, and wasn't 57 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:58,479 taking it too seriously, but it became a serious problem. 58 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:02,220 Please help me welcome Amanda Hultz to the program. 59 00:04:09,790 --> 00:04:12,739 Amanda, when I look at you, you're such a pretty young lady, 60 00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:15,209 it's hard for me to believe that you've ever had 61 00:04:15,210 --> 00:04:19,599 a drug problem, but I want to thank you for coming and sharing 62 00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:22,470 your testimony with us today. 63 00:04:22,570 --> 00:04:27,010 Please tell our audience, how did you go from that point 64 00:04:27,110 --> 00:04:31,370 of just recreational drug use into becoming 65 00:04:31,470 --> 00:04:33,050 a full fledged addict? 66 00:04:33,210 --> 00:04:36,350 At first, like I said, it was recreational. 67 00:04:36,390 --> 00:04:39,580 I just used it on the weekends, I wanted to 68 00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:44,019 do it with my friends, to have a good time, stay up all night 69 00:04:44,020 --> 00:04:47,569 and play cards, but then I had to have it on Monday 70 00:04:47,570 --> 00:04:50,739 because I had to work on Monday, and then it became 71 00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,549 that I needed it on Tuesday, and then I needed it 72 00:04:53,550 --> 00:04:56,749 on Wednesday so that I could stay up and go to work, 73 00:04:56,750 --> 00:04:59,959 and then I quit my job all together, and then I spiraled 74 00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:02,390 downhill, I needed it everyday. 75 00:05:02,430 --> 00:05:04,489 Now, how did this affect your schooling. 76 00:05:04,490 --> 00:05:06,479 Weren't you a cheerleader in school? 77 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:09,769 I was. I was a cheerleader. I was captain of my 78 00:05:09,770 --> 00:05:13,860 cheerleader squad and as soon as I started doing drugs 79 00:05:13,890 --> 00:05:16,489 I actually dropped out of high school. 80 00:05:16,524 --> 00:05:19,089 And you were a very good student, right? 81 00:05:19,090 --> 00:05:20,859 I was. I was a good student. 82 00:05:20,860 --> 00:05:23,590 I was gifted and talented as a child. 83 00:05:24,090 --> 00:05:27,689 Straight A student as a smaller child, and then a good student 84 00:05:27,690 --> 00:05:28,880 in high school. 85 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:32,690 So you dropped out of school and then things began 86 00:05:32,730 --> 00:05:36,499 to get even worse, what did you do to actually support 87 00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:38,060 your drug habit? 88 00:05:38,970 --> 00:05:42,780 About a year into my drug use, I ended up becoming 89 00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:44,670 a drug dealer. 90 00:05:46,070 --> 00:05:49,790 What was that like for you? Did it register up here 91 00:05:49,830 --> 00:05:53,149 for you, Amanda, that you were doing something illegal, 92 00:05:53,150 --> 00:05:56,429 or was this just something that you wanted to do because 93 00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:57,519 you needed a fix? 94 00:05:57,520 --> 00:06:01,419 This was something that I wanted to do because I needed a fix. 95 00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:05,459 I needed it and I didn't have the money to support my habit, 96 00:06:05,460 --> 00:06:09,350 so I did it for the fix. 97 00:06:09,450 --> 00:06:12,819 Well, there's more to this story and in fact, Amanda also shared 98 00:06:12,820 --> 00:06:16,869 with us the rest of the story. When she married the biggest 99 00:06:16,870 --> 00:06:21,410 drug dealer in town, she went further down the slippery slope 100 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:25,400 into the abyss, and to support their drug habit, 101 00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:30,400 Amanda's husband began making fake checks and fake IDs. 102 00:06:30,460 --> 00:06:33,050 So listen to what happened next. 103 00:06:34,540 --> 00:06:38,440 When I gave birth to my son, it came crashing down 104 00:06:38,470 --> 00:06:39,900 on all of us. 105 00:06:40,050 --> 00:06:42,410 5 days after my son was born, 106 00:06:43,010 --> 00:06:46,570 they raided our house and they arrested my husband 107 00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:55,480 and they charged him with several counts of forgery, fraud 108 00:06:55,510 --> 00:07:00,920 and some drug possession. They released him on bail 109 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:07,070 and then had to drop the charges so he continued to sell 110 00:07:07,140 --> 00:07:12,530 methamphetamines and we found out about 4 months after 111 00:07:12,570 --> 00:07:16,950 they released him that they were bringing the charges back up. 112 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:19,569 So, here we had a 4 month old son 113 00:07:19,570 --> 00:07:23,480 and we went on the run from the police. 114 00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:27,050 For several months they followed us 115 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:30,070 from city to city, place to place. 116 00:07:30,110 --> 00:07:33,209 They would find out, we would find out that they knew. 117 00:07:33,210 --> 00:07:37,120 They would raid the house shortly after we would leave. 118 00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:41,550 We would live in drug houses with my infant son, 119 00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:45,000 where they were, actually, even manufacturing. 120 00:07:46,100 --> 00:07:50,940 Then we would leave and the house would, shortly thereafter, 121 00:07:51,140 --> 00:07:54,030 be raided, looking for us. 122 00:07:54,630 --> 00:07:59,540 Finally, one night I was just done. I told my husband 123 00:07:59,570 --> 00:08:02,870 that I had a child that I was going to raise 124 00:08:02,890 --> 00:08:06,150 and that I couldn't live like that anymore. 125 00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:10,189 He said that was fine, I told him I was going to move in 126 00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:14,670 with my family, and that he was going to have to go elsewhere. 127 00:08:15,450 --> 00:08:18,849 We went to go to the store and we got pulled over 128 00:08:18,850 --> 00:08:20,250 by the police. 129 00:08:20,970 --> 00:08:23,250 What happened that night Amanda? 130 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,139 The cops surrounded the car with guns pulled, 131 00:08:28,140 --> 00:08:30,829 and they knew that my husband was in the car, 132 00:08:30,830 --> 00:08:35,119 and they asked him to get out of the car and at that moment 133 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:39,350 he told me that he was done, that he wasn't going to use 134 00:08:39,380 --> 00:08:41,040 ever again. 135 00:08:41,380 --> 00:08:44,149 He actually used the term that he was rescued, 136 00:08:44,150 --> 00:08:47,150 not arrested. So here I was, 137 00:08:47,190 --> 00:08:53,110 I was out, still not having a place to live, raising a baby, 138 00:08:53,140 --> 00:08:56,199 I found out shortly thereafter I was pregnant. 139 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,149 So you had 1 baby and you were pregnant with another one. 140 00:08:59,150 --> 00:09:00,260 Right. 141 00:09:00,550 --> 00:09:04,189 My husband's in jail and he tells me that he gets saved 142 00:09:04,190 --> 00:09:07,440 and that he is turning his life to Christ. 143 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:11,310 And I thought that was ridiculous. 144 00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:16,459 Of course, he could say that. He's in jail, he has a bed 145 00:09:16,460 --> 00:09:20,069 to sleep in, 3 meals a day. I have a baby, I'm pregnant 146 00:09:20,070 --> 00:09:23,320 and I'm trying to work at a waitressing job. 147 00:09:25,630 --> 00:09:28,129 We're you still doing drugs at this time? 148 00:09:28,130 --> 00:09:31,070 I was still using marijuana at the time 149 00:09:31,860 --> 00:09:34,659 for a couple of months, until I found out I was pregnant 150 00:09:34,660 --> 00:09:36,789 and then I stopped using everything. 151 00:09:36,790 --> 00:09:39,470 When you found out you were pregnant. 152 00:09:40,540 --> 00:09:44,809 Your husband calls you and tells you that he has had an encounter 153 00:09:44,810 --> 00:09:48,119 with the Lord, that he's been saved, he's been changed, 154 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,639 you're not buying it. You all went to court, 155 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:52,560 and what happened at court? 156 00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:58,000 My husband stood before the judge and he said that 157 00:09:58,350 --> 00:10:02,460 "I know what I've done is wrong and I know that it was" 158 00:10:02,470 --> 00:10:06,489 "a horrible thing." and he said "I take full responsibility" 159 00:10:06,490 --> 00:10:10,689 "for it", but he said "My first ministry, I would like to be" 160 00:10:10,690 --> 00:10:14,859 "at home with my wife and my children, but if I go to prison" 161 00:10:14,860 --> 00:10:18,489 "I know where God wants me, so that I can minister" 162 00:10:18,490 --> 00:10:21,389 "to other men and lead them to the Lord." 163 00:10:21,390 --> 00:10:24,800 And the judge's face softened, and I saw... 164 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:29,190 ...I saw it happen, I saw the judge soften, and I knew 165 00:10:29,230 --> 00:10:33,390 at that moment that he meant what he said, and that 166 00:10:33,420 --> 00:10:36,090 the Lord was there, present. 167 00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:41,879 He was looking at 14 years and that's even what his 168 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:45,720 lawyer told him, he would probably get at least 7-14. 169 00:10:47,220 --> 00:10:50,539 The judge sentenced him to 10 years and then told him 170 00:10:50,540 --> 00:10:54,039 he only had to serve 6 months and he had already served 171 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:57,509 4 months, so he got out within less than 2 months later 172 00:10:57,510 --> 00:10:58,819 after being sentenced. 173 00:10:58,820 --> 00:11:01,179 Praise the Lord. Now let me ask you something, 174 00:11:01,180 --> 00:11:03,989 were you brought up in a Christian home? 175 00:11:03,990 --> 00:11:06,759 I was actually brought up in a Mormon LDS home. 176 00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:09,459 Okay, so you were brought up in a religious home, 177 00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:12,609 but you really didn't understand about a personal relationship 178 00:11:12,610 --> 00:11:13,629 with the Lord. 179 00:11:13,630 --> 00:11:14,630 No. 180 00:11:14,670 --> 00:11:18,329 So now, when your husband only had that amount of time 181 00:11:18,330 --> 00:11:21,919 given to him by the judge, did this make you believe 182 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:23,509 that there really is a God? 183 00:11:23,510 --> 00:11:25,029 It did. It made me believe 184 00:11:25,030 --> 00:11:28,680 and later that night he called me and I was 185 00:11:29,270 --> 00:11:31,730 ecstatic, I was so excited. 186 00:11:32,850 --> 00:11:35,819 I said "I believe, I believe what you've been telling me." 187 00:11:35,820 --> 00:11:39,920 And he asked me to go into a room, private, 188 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:46,190 and get on my knees and that is when I accepted the Lord 189 00:11:46,220 --> 00:11:49,120 and surrendered my life to Christ. 190 00:11:49,150 --> 00:11:52,020 Praise the Lord. 191 00:11:52,050 --> 00:11:54,260 I think that's wonderful. 192 00:11:55,430 --> 00:11:57,329 Well, in the rest of our program we're going 193 00:11:57,330 --> 00:12:01,229 to try to unveil some of the causes for drug addiction, 194 00:12:01,230 --> 00:12:04,459 and we'll also examine the stages of addiction 195 00:12:04,460 --> 00:12:08,420 and discuss how we can become educated enough to lead 196 00:12:08,450 --> 00:12:11,169 our loved ones to the road of recovery, 197 00:12:11,170 --> 00:12:15,279 but most importantly, we will learn of the resilient nature 198 00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:16,660 of the human mind. 199 00:12:16,700 --> 00:12:19,720 There is great hope for recovery 200 00:12:19,760 --> 00:12:24,500 as Amanda is a testimony to, so please stay with us. 201 00:12:24,530 --> 00:12:26,790 We'll be right back. 202 00:12:37,730 --> 00:12:40,989 We're going to be talking with Dr. Neil Nedly about 203 00:12:40,990 --> 00:12:44,149 some of the common symptoms and the causes of depression. 204 00:12:44,150 --> 00:12:47,890 And I really hate to say this, but in all honesty, 205 00:12:48,190 --> 00:12:52,680 it took every ounce energy I had to even take a shower. 206 00:12:52,850 --> 00:12:55,529 I would be in bed for 5 days at a time. 207 00:12:55,530 --> 00:12:59,160 It was just the most debilitating thing I've ever 208 00:12:59,190 --> 00:13:01,770 gone through in my life. 209 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:04,350 And I would just lay there. 210 00:13:08,250 --> 00:13:11,010 So don't miss it. 211 00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:20,849 Welcome back to Up Close. 212 00:13:20,850 --> 00:13:23,859 I'm excited to introduce our expert guest for today, 213 00:13:23,860 --> 00:13:27,230 Cheri Peters. Cheri was a drug addict, 214 00:13:27,270 --> 00:13:32,450 living on the streets for 10 years, from the ages of 13-23 215 00:13:32,700 --> 00:13:37,590 before she had an encounter with God that turned her life around. 216 00:13:37,740 --> 00:13:42,200 Now Cheri is the director of the True Step Ministries, 217 00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:45,339 an international organization that reaches out 218 00:13:45,340 --> 00:13:49,880 to at risk people, and it's located in Kuna, Idaho. 219 00:13:49,980 --> 00:13:54,240 Cheri is also a Christian author and has written 2 books: 220 00:13:54,270 --> 00:13:57,069 "Miracle from the streets", her life story, 221 00:13:57,070 --> 00:14:02,530 and "God is crazy about you", please welcome Cheri Peters. 222 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:08,540 I'm so glad you're here today, thank you so much. 223 00:14:08,580 --> 00:14:11,269 You know what cracks me up, when somebody says an expert 224 00:14:11,270 --> 00:14:13,619 witness, and I'm wanting to look around, 225 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,819 is somebody else here, because my background 226 00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:17,959 is an addict. When I met Amanda was during 227 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:20,129 the time that she was pregnant and Dave was just getting 228 00:14:20,130 --> 00:14:22,729 out of prison, and those kind of things, and so I work 229 00:14:22,730 --> 00:14:25,449 with addicts, and so the only thing I know for sure 230 00:14:25,450 --> 00:14:28,109 about God and about recovery is God does amazing 231 00:14:28,110 --> 00:14:30,809 things with us. If somebody ran into me 232 00:14:30,810 --> 00:14:33,189 at the airport or at the church, they would never say: 233 00:14:33,190 --> 00:14:35,249 "You know what? She looks like a heroin addict." 234 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:37,769 You know what I mean is that they see somebody that's 235 00:14:37,770 --> 00:14:39,799 in recovery and that looks healthy. 236 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:42,609 Amanda's beautiful, when she was up there talking with you 237 00:14:42,610 --> 00:14:46,330 I was just crying because I thought God is so good. 238 00:14:46,380 --> 00:14:50,029 So the first thing that I want to say about recovery is, 239 00:14:50,030 --> 00:14:53,740 recovery is amazing and everything that God promises 240 00:14:53,770 --> 00:14:57,830 about our life in recovery is true, it's a lot of work, 241 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,270 but we are so resilient. 242 00:15:00,370 --> 00:15:03,509 Well you know, what makes you an expert is this is not 243 00:15:03,510 --> 00:15:06,529 just theory for you, you've lived through the lifestyle 244 00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:09,519 and you've lived through the recovery and God is doing 245 00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:11,570 amazing things in your life. 246 00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:15,280 But in Amanda's case it was methamphetamines, 247 00:15:16,410 --> 00:15:20,140 we know that she had an incredibly dysfunctional 248 00:15:20,180 --> 00:15:25,680 childhood, what can we tell about the causes of addiction 249 00:15:25,710 --> 00:15:28,120 from the choice of addiction? 250 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:31,329 With Amanda, she needed something that would give her 251 00:15:31,330 --> 00:15:33,960 some power because she was powerless. 252 00:15:34,630 --> 00:15:37,780 Methamphetamines does that, Coke does that, 253 00:15:37,820 --> 00:15:40,869 anything that's a stimulant, anything that's going to give 254 00:15:40,870 --> 00:15:45,120 her the ability to feel that she can do anything. 255 00:15:45,910 --> 00:15:49,559 So it's an arousal stage, it's a hype of high that just says 256 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:53,019 that somebody that's powerless, somebody that's abused, 257 00:15:53,020 --> 00:15:56,709 somebody has really been damaged in a dysfunctional family 258 00:15:56,710 --> 00:15:59,539 will get a lot of their needs met in that way. 259 00:15:59,540 --> 00:16:02,669 Seratonin levels, if you know anything about neurochemistry, 260 00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:05,389 seratonin levels get kicked off with amphetamines 261 00:16:05,390 --> 00:16:08,049 and all of a sudden you feel euphoric, anything is possible, 262 00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:11,119 "I can do anything", and this is from a child that felt 263 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,419 "I could do nothing and no one cares about me," 264 00:16:14,420 --> 00:16:17,019 "and I couldn't care less about life" and all of a sudden 265 00:16:17,020 --> 00:16:20,019 she wants to live, so the first part, when Amanda was talking 266 00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,425 about the first part of her 267 00:16:21,460 --> 00:16:22,989 addiction is everything seemed fun, 268 00:16:22,990 --> 00:16:26,409 everything was incredible and then it got to the point 269 00:16:26,410 --> 00:16:28,079 where I couldn't do this anymore. 270 00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:30,469 When I started coming off of the drug, with an arousal 271 00:16:30,470 --> 00:16:33,619 kind of high is when I come off the drug, then my neurochemistry 272 00:16:33,620 --> 00:16:36,609 is actually flat and I'm not even producing what I was 273 00:16:36,610 --> 00:16:38,999 producing before I felt that euphoria. 274 00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:42,209 So with her, the stages about getting more and more 275 00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:45,559 of the drug, was just a progression of the addiction. 276 00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:49,309 Another part of a high is what's called "saturation". 277 00:16:49,310 --> 00:16:53,029 Somebody that is needing to be filled up, they are empty, 278 00:16:53,030 --> 00:16:55,619 they want to be numbed from pain, and that was more 279 00:16:55,620 --> 00:16:58,430 my story. I was homeless from 13-23, 280 00:16:58,470 --> 00:17:02,599 my parents were addicts, and I was empty inside, so I chose 281 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:07,480 things like heroin, marijuana, valium, zanex, 282 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:10,299 things that are going to sedate me and where I could 283 00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,939 escape, I can step away totally and escape. 284 00:17:12,940 --> 00:17:16,649 The last part of a high, or an addictive personality 285 00:17:16,650 --> 00:17:20,299 is fantasy, or trance-like stage, and that's more like 286 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:23,499 sexual addictions, but I want to totally detach from who I am, 287 00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:26,669 from the pain, or the discomfort or the reality that I live in 288 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:29,279 everyday, I want to be different from... 289 00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:33,099 So usually addictions start with a catalyst of some kind. 290 00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:35,339 Wanting to be different than I am 291 00:17:35,340 --> 00:17:39,850 and finding that in a thing, in an object or in an event, 292 00:17:40,030 --> 00:17:42,589 so I'm not finding it in a person, I'm not finding it 293 00:17:42,590 --> 00:17:45,119 in anything real, I'm finding it in something that is 294 00:17:45,120 --> 00:17:48,570 not real, an illusion. 295 00:17:48,630 --> 00:17:52,130 So basically, let's see if I get this right, 296 00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,749 there's 3 types: there's the arousal, 297 00:17:54,750 --> 00:17:58,740 the people who are powerless, who want to be empowered 298 00:17:58,780 --> 00:18:02,169 and drugs do that for them. Then there is the sedating; 299 00:18:02,170 --> 00:18:05,529 people who want to be numbed and want to forget what's 300 00:18:05,530 --> 00:18:09,070 going on in their life. Then the other one is 301 00:18:09,100 --> 00:18:12,169 the fantasy-like. Would gambling fall into this? 302 00:18:12,170 --> 00:18:15,169 Oh yeah. Gambling is "Oh, I want to win big," 303 00:18:15,170 --> 00:18:17,819 "and I want to be a big spender" and while they're pulling 304 00:18:17,820 --> 00:18:20,329 the slot machine even if they're winning or losing, 305 00:18:20,330 --> 00:18:23,099 that sense of "I'm in this beautiful place," 306 00:18:23,100 --> 00:18:26,079 "and there's chandeliers" and all that kind of stuff is 307 00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:28,989 that fantasy "I can be something other than who I am". 308 00:18:28,990 --> 00:18:33,150 So all addictions, like cancer, nobody can really understand 309 00:18:34,530 --> 00:18:37,949 all kinds of cancers unless they understand the basic thing 310 00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:41,359 of cancer, it's multiplying of these dysfunctional cells. 311 00:18:41,360 --> 00:18:43,729 In addiction it's the same thing, there's a common thread 312 00:18:43,730 --> 00:18:47,169 through all addictions and that's trying to escape 313 00:18:47,170 --> 00:18:49,440 into something that's not real. 314 00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:51,820 Since what you're saying to me, 315 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:57,010 let's see if this makes sense, when somebody gets clean, 316 00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:00,430 like for example when she got clean, 317 00:19:00,460 --> 00:19:03,700 when Amanda was rid of her drugs, 318 00:19:03,860 --> 00:19:06,469 that's doesn't mean that she's not longer a drug addict 319 00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:09,209 if the cause was still there, is that correct? 320 00:19:09,210 --> 00:19:11,769 I wish that when I was a heroin addict for 10 years 321 00:19:11,770 --> 00:19:13,279 and somebody said "Cheri all you've got to do" 322 00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,879 "is stop using heroin". I did, and my life was still a mess. 323 00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:19,139 And I'm thinking "how fair is that?" 324 00:19:19,140 --> 00:19:21,399 I still didn't know how to relate to people, 325 00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:23,649 I was dysfunctional, I didn't know how to trust, 326 00:19:23,650 --> 00:19:26,140 I didn't know how to do anything. 327 00:19:26,190 --> 00:19:28,649 The first part of breaking an addiction is to get out 328 00:19:28,650 --> 00:19:31,079 of denial, and denial means "I don't even know that I" 329 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,990 "always lie." Use it as an acronym. 330 00:19:36,930 --> 00:19:41,610 "I just don't know anything". So the first step 331 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:45,099 of the first step is getting away from the drug, 332 00:19:45,100 --> 00:19:47,359 but that is just the very beginning. 333 00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:49,689 We're going to talk more about recovery in our next segment, 334 00:19:49,690 --> 00:19:52,710 but let me ask you this question as well, 335 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,519 what are some of the stages of addiction? 336 00:19:55,520 --> 00:20:00,740 I believe, if you all are like me, I had a sister who was 337 00:20:00,770 --> 00:20:05,360 a heroin and drug addict for 15 years, the Lord healed 338 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:09,960 her, literally, over night, but we didn't recognize 339 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:13,600 the symptoms of how she got started in this, 340 00:20:13,700 --> 00:20:16,299 and the different stages of what was going on. 341 00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,139 So what are some of the stages? 342 00:20:18,140 --> 00:20:20,259 Some people in the audience will find themselves 343 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:21,869 in various stages of addiction. 344 00:20:21,870 --> 00:20:23,769 The first stage is always the one 345 00:20:23,770 --> 00:20:27,239 where I start to lie to myself. I'm actually getting pulled by 346 00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:29,850 something that has met a need. 347 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,299 I'm starting to rationalize within my own mind, 348 00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:36,079 I'm starting to protect whatever the behaviour is that is 349 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:39,079 filling that need, whether it's drugs, alcohol, sex or whatever, 350 00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,119 eating, workaholism, and so I'm starting to protect it, 351 00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:45,099 so the first stage is very internal, nobody sees it, 352 00:20:45,100 --> 00:20:48,329 nobody understands that there's really a change happening. 353 00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:51,639 The second stage is that I'm starting to lie to you. 354 00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:55,030 I'm starting to say, sex addicts, 355 00:20:55,070 --> 00:20:57,369 "I'm not really online doing anything wrong." 356 00:20:57,370 --> 00:21:00,249 even though they've been on 3 hours on a porn site. 357 00:21:00,250 --> 00:21:03,209 They start to lie to the people around them, they start to 358 00:21:03,210 --> 00:21:06,329 see you as an enemy; "you are somehow trying to rob" 359 00:21:06,330 --> 00:21:07,850 "my only security." 360 00:21:08,610 --> 00:21:11,519 "I'm not hurting anyone," like Amanda said, "I'm not hurting" 361 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:14,009 "anyone, I'm just having fun". So what she's trying to do 362 00:21:14,010 --> 00:21:16,469 right now is rationalize, and that's the second stage, 363 00:21:16,470 --> 00:21:18,079 is being able to rationalize that. 364 00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:21,099 The third stage, and a lot of people have seen addicts 365 00:21:21,100 --> 00:21:23,759 in this stage, they are totally out of control. 366 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:25,749 They are losing jobs, they are losing spouses, 367 00:21:25,750 --> 00:21:30,070 they are financially in a mess, you can start seeing physical 368 00:21:30,100 --> 00:21:33,609 issues happening with them, the liver starting to shut down. 369 00:21:33,610 --> 00:21:35,769 3rd stage is "I'm losing everything", and I will not 370 00:21:35,770 --> 00:21:38,019 get out of the third stage without intervention. 371 00:21:38,020 --> 00:21:41,529 But there's 3 distinctive stages in all addictions. 372 00:21:41,530 --> 00:21:44,979 Now, in the 3rd stage, isn't it true that their brains 373 00:21:44,980 --> 00:21:49,520 have been so suppressed, as far as the seratonin development, 374 00:21:49,550 --> 00:21:52,269 that they no longer have rational thinking. 375 00:21:52,270 --> 00:21:54,669 What's really interesting about that is some people have 376 00:21:54,670 --> 00:21:57,629 even said it's like talking to a schizophrenic, talking to 377 00:21:57,630 --> 00:22:00,599 an addict in the 3rd stage, they do not reason with their 378 00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,379 frontal lobe and that's where we reason, they have done 379 00:22:03,380 --> 00:22:06,119 PET scans on addicts in this stage, and there's no frontal 380 00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:08,709 lobe activity, so they can't reason. 381 00:22:08,710 --> 00:22:10,899 When we say "I can't believe you don't understand this" 382 00:22:10,900 --> 00:22:13,059 and you're talking to somebody you love and is totally 383 00:22:13,060 --> 00:22:15,830 falling apart, they do not hear you. 384 00:22:15,870 --> 00:22:18,389 They honestly do not hear you. When they're manipulating you, 385 00:22:18,390 --> 00:22:21,829 they don't even know that they are manipulating anymore. 386 00:22:21,830 --> 00:22:24,920 That stage is beyond any kind of reasoning, 387 00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:29,179 all you can do with that stage with an addict is pray for them 388 00:22:29,180 --> 00:22:33,760 and be able to intervene in short, little spurts with truth, 389 00:22:33,790 --> 00:22:36,189 and hopefully they will hear something. 390 00:22:36,190 --> 00:22:40,019 Have you seen the advertisement on television where it shows 391 00:22:40,020 --> 00:22:44,030 the frying pan and then it says: "This is your brain." 392 00:22:44,060 --> 00:22:48,000 And then it shows the fried egg, they crack an egg 393 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:52,760 and say "this is your brain on drugs", the cognitive impairment 394 00:22:52,860 --> 00:22:56,880 is so bad, that they are not reasoning, and you can't 395 00:22:56,910 --> 00:22:59,029 reason with them. Now, for example, Amanda, 396 00:22:59,030 --> 00:23:02,039 you told me earlier that you were in the hospital 397 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:05,159 and you were being treated, your kidneys were shutting down. 398 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:10,230 Right. My kidneys were failing, completely failing. 399 00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:13,640 I was on dialysis for a little bit. 400 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:16,580 Listen, in the 80's you were 83 pounds. 401 00:23:18,690 --> 00:23:20,949 I weighed 86 pounds, I was in the hospital, 402 00:23:20,950 --> 00:23:23,869 I was so dehydrated that my kidneys were literally 403 00:23:23,870 --> 00:23:28,059 shutting down, and I couldn't wait to get out of the hospital 404 00:23:28,060 --> 00:23:30,049 so that I could get another fix. 405 00:23:30,050 --> 00:23:32,550 How long were you in the hospital? 406 00:23:32,585 --> 00:23:33,440 3 weeks. 407 00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:37,720 3 weeks, so in my mind, and probably in your mind as well, 408 00:23:37,790 --> 00:23:42,550 we would think that 3 weeks of no drug use, it aught to be 409 00:23:42,580 --> 00:23:46,549 out of her system, but yet they are not thinking properly. 410 00:23:46,550 --> 00:23:50,489 Well, coming up next we're going to introduce you to a man 411 00:23:50,490 --> 00:23:53,640 who battled a lifelong addiction to drugs, 412 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:58,000 so please stay with us for this encouraging story. 413 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,339 Are you, or someone you love, struggling 414 00:24:04,340 --> 00:24:06,699 with drugs or alcohol? Do you sometimes wonder 415 00:24:06,700 --> 00:24:09,909 if there is hope? If so, we have just the book for you. 416 00:24:09,910 --> 00:24:12,009 Be encouraged as you read the promises that God 417 00:24:12,010 --> 00:24:15,189 has given in His word. Call or write today for your free gift 418 00:24:15,190 --> 00:24:17,699 of "God's promises" for your every need. 419 00:24:17,700 --> 00:24:19,093 You can write to us at: 420 00:24:19,100 --> 00:24:23,281 Up Close, PO Box 220 West Frankfort, IL 62896 421 00:24:23,380 --> 00:24:25,129 Or call during regular business hours: 422 00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:30,250 1-800-752-3226 or 618-627-4651 423 00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,760 Ask for Up Close Offer Nr. 2. 424 00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:41,899 Welcome back to Up Close. Today we're talking about 425 00:24:41,900 --> 00:24:45,129 recovery from drug addiction, and our next guest 426 00:24:45,130 --> 00:24:48,450 is Ivan Morfit from Wichita, Kansas. 427 00:24:48,490 --> 00:24:52,050 Ivan was tragically introduced to drugs as a youth 428 00:24:52,070 --> 00:24:55,770 by his older sister who thought it would be funny 429 00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:59,470 to see her brother high. Here's Ivan's story. 430 00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:04,239 My older sister starting giving me drugs when I was probably 431 00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,220 11 years old. I'm not sure why, I never 432 00:25:07,260 --> 00:25:11,980 really asked her, but it was probably simply to be amused 433 00:25:12,010 --> 00:25:15,160 by the antics that I would do. 434 00:25:16,900 --> 00:25:20,259 It was a very powerful thing for me because then I got 435 00:25:20,260 --> 00:25:23,579 to hang out with her and all of her friends, and I was 436 00:25:23,580 --> 00:25:26,270 socially accepted into that peer group 437 00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:28,840 as their little buddy. 438 00:25:30,930 --> 00:25:33,969 I used to spend the weekends with my sister at her house, 439 00:25:33,970 --> 00:25:38,550 and we would smoke pot and watch TV and hang out, 440 00:25:38,580 --> 00:25:40,600 or sometimes we would drink. 441 00:25:42,120 --> 00:25:47,390 For me, it was being cool. I was cool, to hang out 442 00:25:47,590 --> 00:25:49,370 and do all those things. 443 00:25:51,780 --> 00:25:54,719 When you're 11 years old you just don't stop and think 444 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:57,629 about consequences, you don't have the mental acuity 445 00:25:57,630 --> 00:25:59,160 to do that. 446 00:26:00,510 --> 00:26:04,700 It really became engrained into my personality, 447 00:26:04,730 --> 00:26:09,310 into my behaviour. All through school 448 00:26:09,850 --> 00:26:14,550 I was smoking and drinking and carrying on as I wanted to. 449 00:26:15,180 --> 00:26:19,319 Teachers would pull me aside and say "Ivan, you're a really" 450 00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:23,320 "smart guy, why are you going through the emotions?" 451 00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:25,909 Well, I didn't tell them it's because I'm getting high 452 00:26:25,910 --> 00:26:30,430 every weekend and not worrying about it, and I never thought 453 00:26:30,460 --> 00:26:32,810 about what it would lead to. 454 00:26:35,230 --> 00:26:38,969 Ivan didn't realize how this was going to affect his life, 455 00:26:38,970 --> 00:26:43,079 and how long, when Ivan actually met the woman of his dreams, 456 00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:47,219 she loved him so much that she tolerated his drug addiction 457 00:26:47,220 --> 00:26:49,510 and agreed to marry him anyway. 458 00:26:49,650 --> 00:26:53,079 But Ivan received a wake up call when the couple 459 00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:56,549 was expecting their first baby, and when his wife 460 00:26:56,550 --> 00:27:00,130 faced frightening complications, let's have a look. 461 00:27:00,470 --> 00:27:03,320 We had our first child, my son, Daniel, 462 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,780 and I still used drugs. 463 00:27:08,030 --> 00:27:11,710 And then she got pregnant with our daughter, Audrey, 464 00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:14,710 and got exposed to chicken pox 465 00:27:15,660 --> 00:27:18,140 and she ended up in a coma. 466 00:27:19,850 --> 00:27:22,319 42 days. I didn't know if she was 467 00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:24,990 going to live, she was going to die. 468 00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,489 My daughter was born 2 and a half months premature 469 00:27:28,490 --> 00:27:32,550 and I couldn't hold her, I couldn't pick her up, 470 00:27:32,590 --> 00:27:36,600 I couldn't touch her, she had all these tubes and wires 471 00:27:36,630 --> 00:27:40,090 and leads wired to her body to keep her alive. 472 00:27:41,330 --> 00:27:46,130 I think that was the pivotal point when 473 00:27:47,090 --> 00:27:52,490 I realized no matter how much drugs I did, I was still unhappy 474 00:27:53,680 --> 00:27:59,110 and I began to look; there's got to be something out here 475 00:27:59,210 --> 00:28:01,130 that'll make me happy. 476 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:06,199 I couldn't fight the depression and I couldn't fight the feeling 477 00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:10,650 that there is something missing in your life, and you better 478 00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:12,630 figure out what it is. 479 00:28:13,550 --> 00:28:15,629 Well we're happy to have Ivan here with us today, 480 00:28:15,630 --> 00:28:18,429 and we'd like to ask him to come on up, so please help me 481 00:28:18,430 --> 00:28:21,450 welcome Ivan Morfit. 482 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:29,599 Thank you for being here today to share your testimony. 483 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:35,620 When your wife was in that coma, what was going through your mind 484 00:28:35,820 --> 00:28:39,360 as far as what you've been doing with your life? 485 00:28:40,790 --> 00:28:43,200 At first I would just say 486 00:28:44,270 --> 00:28:46,070 "do more drugs!" 487 00:28:47,090 --> 00:28:51,410 I was so miserable I couldn't function, and then 488 00:28:51,580 --> 00:28:57,590 when I realized that I was still so unhappy, even when I was high 489 00:28:57,620 --> 00:29:01,360 that I had to figure something out. 490 00:29:02,300 --> 00:29:05,950 So did you think that she could possibly die, 491 00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:08,529 were you facing a life and death issue? 492 00:29:08,530 --> 00:29:12,960 That year was a bad year, there were 4 other expecting mothers 493 00:29:12,990 --> 00:29:15,019 at the hospital with chicken pox that year 494 00:29:15,020 --> 00:29:18,809 and in all 4 instances either the mother or the infant died. 495 00:29:18,810 --> 00:29:21,190 Oh my goodness! Oh, mercy. 496 00:29:21,580 --> 00:29:27,000 So then, you started off doing more drugs initially 497 00:29:27,030 --> 00:29:30,710 during these 42 days, but something happened 498 00:29:30,750 --> 00:29:34,460 when you went to a party and you went from a party 499 00:29:34,500 --> 00:29:38,570 to a church - could you tell us a little bit about that. 500 00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:43,799 Being at the party and just singing and doing all the things 501 00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:47,000 that I did, I couldn't handle it anymore, 502 00:29:47,490 --> 00:29:49,260 I was so miserable. 503 00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:53,350 I went for a drive. 504 00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:57,799 I'm just driving in my vehicle and I'm looking around 505 00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:01,540 and I ended up, actually here, at 3 Angels church. 506 00:30:01,940 --> 00:30:05,370 And it was very quiet and it was very peaceful. 507 00:30:05,430 --> 00:30:08,109 I had tried everything the devil could give me 508 00:30:08,110 --> 00:30:10,800 to make me happy, I mean everything. 509 00:30:11,450 --> 00:30:15,290 So that night I tried something new, I said a prayer. 510 00:30:15,710 --> 00:30:20,750 I said "God, I can't figure this out, I need Your help." 511 00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:22,879 Was this your first prayer? 512 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:24,180 Pretty much. 513 00:30:24,220 --> 00:30:27,799 And then how this prayer opened the way, and started you 514 00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:31,339 on the road to recovery, tell us a little about your road 515 00:30:31,340 --> 00:30:33,080 to recovery. 516 00:30:34,150 --> 00:30:37,599 I started Bible study with some men here in the church 517 00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:42,730 and every time they met with me, I knew that 518 00:30:43,340 --> 00:30:46,850 whatever they had, I wanted. 519 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:52,040 I studied the Bible for over a year 520 00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:56,500 and then when school started I put my son here in the school. 521 00:30:57,330 --> 00:30:59,709 He came up to me one day and he said: "You know, dad" 522 00:30:59,710 --> 00:31:01,849 "I really think we should be baptized." 523 00:31:01,850 --> 00:31:04,230 Praise the Lord. How old was he? 524 00:31:04,310 --> 00:31:05,460 12 at the time. 525 00:31:05,470 --> 00:31:08,940 How old is your baby that was born after 526 00:31:08,970 --> 00:31:10,439 the chicken pox incident? 527 00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,280 She's 11 now and She's something else. 528 00:31:13,300 --> 00:31:14,669 And she's a healthy baby? 529 00:31:14,670 --> 00:31:15,460 Yeah. 530 00:31:15,461 --> 00:31:17,949 Praise the Lord. Well, when Ivan was speaking 531 00:31:17,950 --> 00:31:22,350 with us earlier, he reflected on what might have been. 532 00:31:24,310 --> 00:31:28,590 I think the most dangerous thing for the youth of today 533 00:31:29,210 --> 00:31:33,040 is that drugs make you feel good. 534 00:31:33,380 --> 00:31:35,489 I'm not going to deny it, I can't deny it. 535 00:31:35,490 --> 00:31:38,110 I did drugs for over 20 years. 536 00:31:40,620 --> 00:31:43,330 They don't understand, 537 00:31:45,230 --> 00:31:46,979 they'll say "well, I don't rob banks." 538 00:31:46,980 --> 00:31:49,239 "I don't beat up old ladies. I don't do all those things" 539 00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:51,469 "that drug addicts do." Well, it doesn't matter, 540 00:31:51,470 --> 00:31:53,850 I didn't do those things either. 541 00:31:55,690 --> 00:31:59,860 I scored really high on on all those standardized testing 542 00:31:59,890 --> 00:32:01,730 that schools used. 543 00:32:02,810 --> 00:32:06,990 I believe I have a really great intellect, but here I am, 544 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:11,060 I'm a 35 year old man, family, and I work part time 545 00:32:11,100 --> 00:32:12,420 in a warehouse. 546 00:32:14,500 --> 00:32:18,300 What could I have done if I had put the drugs away? 547 00:32:18,510 --> 00:32:20,260 Where would I be now? 548 00:32:20,860 --> 00:32:24,609 Ivan, it's a sad thing when God gave you so much potential 549 00:32:24,610 --> 00:32:26,639 and you feel like you haven't used that. 550 00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:28,649 What do you think might have been? 551 00:32:28,650 --> 00:32:30,820 What was your interest before? 552 00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:34,589 Or were you too young to really even gain that interest? 553 00:32:34,590 --> 00:32:37,989 No, from the time I was really young, I was always reading 554 00:32:37,990 --> 00:32:39,450 books on science. 555 00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:43,390 Natural history, stuff like that. 556 00:32:43,510 --> 00:32:46,249 Archeology is a really big interest of mine, 557 00:32:46,250 --> 00:32:48,650 I love watching Discovery Channel, 558 00:32:48,830 --> 00:32:50,400 it's great. 559 00:32:51,090 --> 00:32:55,340 There's really no telling what I might have done or become. 560 00:32:57,460 --> 00:32:59,450 I try not to dwell on it. 561 00:33:00,350 --> 00:33:02,909 One of the crew, when I was doing my interview, 562 00:33:02,910 --> 00:33:06,789 told me, he said "I was 34 with a family, and I went back" 563 00:33:06,790 --> 00:33:09,630 "to university and I now have a Ph.D." 564 00:33:09,710 --> 00:33:11,790 He said it's never too late. 565 00:33:12,940 --> 00:33:15,229 You know what I was just getting ready to tell him, 566 00:33:15,230 --> 00:33:18,369 God is the God of the impossible, all things 567 00:33:18,370 --> 00:33:21,229 are possible with God, so we're just going to be believing 568 00:33:21,230 --> 00:33:23,240 and praying for you. 569 00:33:24,420 --> 00:33:27,529 I know He has a purpose for your life, He's got a plan for your 570 00:33:27,530 --> 00:33:30,029 life and you're beginning to walk in that. 571 00:33:30,030 --> 00:33:33,219 We'll just believe that God is going to bring about 572 00:33:33,220 --> 00:33:36,499 some wonderful things in your life, so thank you. 573 00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:39,769 Please stay tuned, when we return we're going to be talking 574 00:33:39,770 --> 00:33:43,850 with Cheri Peters again about how families can educate 575 00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:47,840 themselves and reach out to at risk loved ones, 576 00:33:48,140 --> 00:33:50,090 so don't go away. 577 00:33:59,290 --> 00:34:02,499 We're going to be talking with Dr. Neil Nedly about 578 00:34:02,500 --> 00:34:05,779 some of the common symptoms and the causes of depression. 579 00:34:05,780 --> 00:34:09,570 And I really hate to say this, but in all honesty, 580 00:34:09,820 --> 00:34:14,380 it took every ounce energy I had to even take a shower. 581 00:34:14,530 --> 00:34:17,049 I would be in bed for 5 days at a time. 582 00:34:17,050 --> 00:34:20,700 It was just the most debilitating thing I've ever 583 00:34:20,730 --> 00:34:23,370 gone through in my life. 584 00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:26,010 And I would just lay there. 585 00:34:29,770 --> 00:34:31,560 So don't miss it. 586 00:34:38,290 --> 00:34:39,709 Welcome back to Up Close. 587 00:34:39,710 --> 00:34:42,929 We're talking to Cheri Peters, a former drug addict, 588 00:34:42,930 --> 00:34:46,170 who was literally a miracle from the streets. 589 00:34:46,990 --> 00:34:50,189 Cheri, if you would, you mentioned to me earlier 590 00:34:50,190 --> 00:34:51,749 when we were just talking by ourselves, 591 00:34:51,750 --> 00:34:54,449 a story about Lance Michael, could you share 592 00:34:54,450 --> 00:34:56,139 just a little bit about that. 593 00:34:56,140 --> 00:34:58,029 That, to me, was one of the saddest things. 594 00:34:58,030 --> 00:35:03,160 Lance Michael was an incredible kid, was very good in school, 595 00:35:03,260 --> 00:35:06,379 his family loved him, parents were very normal 596 00:35:06,380 --> 00:35:08,770 and very involved in their lives. 597 00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:12,920 Lance gets strung out on methamphetamine in the 9th grade 598 00:35:13,020 --> 00:35:16,760 and was dead by the time he was 22 years old. 599 00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,919 But I've got to tell you, in that process, he found out, 600 00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:23,430 after he started experimenting with drugs, 601 00:35:23,470 --> 00:35:26,679 he found out that his heart was blown up, and swollen up, 602 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:29,859 and the doctors said "you even need a heart transplant". 603 00:35:29,860 --> 00:35:32,770 His mom totally panicked, 604 00:35:33,300 --> 00:35:35,899 could you imagine, as mom, hearing that? 605 00:35:35,900 --> 00:35:38,209 Was it the drugs that caused this? 606 00:35:38,210 --> 00:35:42,910 The drugs accelerated a natural condition in this family 607 00:35:43,220 --> 00:35:46,999 that the men typically die when they're 70, 80 years old. 608 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:50,739 This kid's dying at 18 years old, but it was a predisposition 609 00:35:50,740 --> 00:35:52,909 in this family for this type of heart disease, 610 00:35:52,910 --> 00:35:55,369 but the methamphetamine just sped that up. 611 00:35:55,370 --> 00:35:57,119 So he's in the hospital, he's on IVs, 612 00:35:57,120 --> 00:35:59,969 he's waiting for a heart transplant and he pulls 613 00:35:59,970 --> 00:36:02,859 the IVs from his arm and goes and gets high. 614 00:36:02,860 --> 00:36:06,010 And his mum said she would cry to somebody 615 00:36:06,110 --> 00:36:08,689 "I don't understand addiction. I don't understand" 616 00:36:08,690 --> 00:36:11,459 "what this is, somebody should have taught me because I don't" 617 00:36:11,460 --> 00:36:15,499 "even know how to reach him. I don't how to tell him to stop" 618 00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:19,179 When he turns 21 he finally says "I can't accept a heart" 619 00:36:19,180 --> 00:36:21,739 "because if I did this to someone else's heart," 620 00:36:21,740 --> 00:36:24,109 "what I've done to my own heart, I wouldn't be able to live" 621 00:36:24,110 --> 00:36:26,439 "with myself." Takes himself off the heart transplant list 622 00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:29,289 and dies within 3 months, and this is a family 623 00:36:29,290 --> 00:36:31,260 that was in love with him. 624 00:36:31,370 --> 00:36:33,809 Ivan, your family you said was pretty normal when you 625 00:36:33,810 --> 00:36:37,059 were growing up, and all those kind of things. 626 00:36:37,060 --> 00:36:39,970 The addiction just took this kid's life. 627 00:36:40,090 --> 00:36:43,250 The mom said at one point she thought 628 00:36:43,450 --> 00:36:45,779 "he just needs to do something. He just needs to be" 629 00:36:45,780 --> 00:36:48,189 "involved in something." So she wanted to make 630 00:36:48,190 --> 00:36:50,529 a hobby for him. So she said "Lance, what would" 631 00:36:50,530 --> 00:36:53,469 "you like to learn, or do?" And he said "I'd like to do" 632 00:36:53,470 --> 00:36:55,040 "glass blowing." 633 00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:57,819 For any addicts in the audience, why do you think 634 00:36:57,820 --> 00:37:00,599 he wanted to glass blow? Do you have any idea? 635 00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:03,329 He wanted to make his own pipes, and his mom didn't 636 00:37:03,330 --> 00:37:06,299 know that because she's not educated, so she sent 637 00:37:06,300 --> 00:37:09,229 him to school to learn how to blow glass, and he made 638 00:37:09,230 --> 00:37:12,280 the cutest little pipes to smoke crack in. 639 00:37:12,730 --> 00:37:15,939 His mom even found a pipe, a little bear, in the trash can 640 00:37:15,940 --> 00:37:18,469 with a long tail, and she said "Lance, why did you" 641 00:37:18,470 --> 00:37:20,960 "throw this away, it is so cute." 642 00:37:21,930 --> 00:37:24,299 She got it out and gave it back to him, and said 643 00:37:24,300 --> 00:37:26,959 you can make something of this, and it was a pipe to smoke 644 00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:28,840 his meth in. 645 00:37:29,010 --> 00:37:32,049 So I really believe that for families you've got to be 646 00:37:32,050 --> 00:37:35,059 educated, and we hate to educate ourselves with darker 647 00:37:35,060 --> 00:37:37,729 things, but addiction is all around us 648 00:37:37,730 --> 00:37:40,379 and we need to know what it is, what it looks like. 649 00:37:40,380 --> 00:37:43,979 I would even suggest, if you're worried about your child using 650 00:37:43,980 --> 00:37:46,819 or your spouse using, get a drug test, tell them to pee 651 00:37:46,820 --> 00:37:48,550 in this bottle. 652 00:37:48,850 --> 00:37:51,669 I am so bold when it comes to that, if I am hanging 653 00:37:51,670 --> 00:37:53,989 out with somebody and I think they're using, 654 00:37:53,990 --> 00:37:55,659 "You've got to pee in this bottle." 655 00:37:55,660 --> 00:37:58,129 If they don't do it, I will set boundaries. 656 00:37:58,130 --> 00:38:01,219 "Then you can't be over here with us because I can't" 657 00:38:01,220 --> 00:38:04,279 "have you using, and lying to yourself and lying to us." 658 00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:06,159 So I really set strong boundaries. 659 00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:10,200 So how do families educate themselves, because even though 660 00:38:10,330 --> 00:38:13,849 my sister was a drug addict for 15 years, I prayed 661 00:38:13,850 --> 00:38:18,250 for her everyday for 15 years and the Lord did deliver her 662 00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:21,380 in an unusual way, literally overnight. 663 00:38:21,410 --> 00:38:23,210 Oh, and I hate that. 664 00:38:23,250 --> 00:38:24,980 That was 18 years ago. 665 00:38:25,020 --> 00:38:27,769 And I say that I hate that, not because of any other reason 666 00:38:27,770 --> 00:38:30,559 than some people work the rest of their life in their recovery. 667 00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:33,149 My sister, when she prayed to the Lord 668 00:38:33,150 --> 00:38:35,749 and surrendered, and said "OK, I'm ready," 669 00:38:35,750 --> 00:38:38,459 "I'm powerless, give me Your Holy Spirit." 670 00:38:38,460 --> 00:38:41,929 That was nearly 18 years ago and she's never done 671 00:38:41,930 --> 00:38:43,380 drugs since. 672 00:38:44,030 --> 00:38:45,810 That's rare isn't it? 673 00:38:45,850 --> 00:38:47,509 Right. It's rare. God is faithful. 674 00:38:47,510 --> 00:38:52,420 The reason I think it's rare is He knows that if I would have 675 00:38:52,450 --> 00:38:54,289 gotten victory over night, I would have been using 676 00:38:54,290 --> 00:38:56,069 the next day. Do you know what I mean? 677 00:38:56,070 --> 00:38:58,539 So I had to learn the whole process of recovery, 678 00:38:58,540 --> 00:39:02,760 I had to learn to hate the drugs and the dysfunction. 679 00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:06,990 I had to learn that it's better to be honest and not lie 680 00:39:07,020 --> 00:39:09,069 and manipulate. Why do I not have sex 681 00:39:09,070 --> 00:39:11,429 with different people? Because it's better to be 682 00:39:11,430 --> 00:39:15,240 in a monogamous relationship that has more purity. 683 00:39:15,270 --> 00:39:17,749 So God teaches us slowly in recovery. 684 00:39:17,750 --> 00:39:21,979 But for family education, with your sister is a good example, 685 00:39:21,980 --> 00:39:24,939 you start noticing changes in your sister, and everybody 686 00:39:24,940 --> 00:39:27,510 hides that, nobody says anything. 687 00:39:27,540 --> 00:39:30,170 People start making excuses for them, 688 00:39:31,670 --> 00:39:34,819 instead of confronting: "It's not OK that you're no longer" 689 00:39:34,820 --> 00:39:37,539 "doing good in school. I'ts not OK that you're hanging out" 690 00:39:37,540 --> 00:39:40,039 "with friends that you would not have hung out with before." 691 00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:42,499 "It's not OK with me" - for a husband- "that you're not" 692 00:39:42,500 --> 00:39:44,789 "coming home at night. It's not OK with me" 693 00:39:44,790 --> 00:39:46,899 "that you're working till 12 o'clock at the office." 694 00:39:46,900 --> 00:39:50,350 All those things, when you see behavioral changes 695 00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:53,970 in somebody you love, do not let that go unspoken. 696 00:39:54,420 --> 00:39:56,039 People say "well, I don't want to nag." 697 00:39:56,040 --> 00:39:57,940 I don't want them to die. 698 00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:00,969 Chris, Lance's mum, did not want to bury her son 699 00:40:00,970 --> 00:40:04,039 and she did, and she said I enabled him right into 700 00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:07,239 the grave because I didn't know how to speak to him, 701 00:40:07,240 --> 00:40:09,599 and I didn't know about drug education. 702 00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:13,039 Go online and find out signs and symptoms of different 703 00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:16,009 addictions, get yourself books from the library. 704 00:40:16,010 --> 00:40:20,030 There is so much information out there that you couldn't 705 00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,269 read or take in everything that's out there. 706 00:40:23,270 --> 00:40:27,369 Stop living in denial yourself that "I don't have to be aware." 707 00:40:27,370 --> 00:40:28,879 I think you just hit the nail no the head, 708 00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:31,919 Most of us feel overwhelmed. I know some of your symptoms, 709 00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:34,919 Amanda, you began losing weight, your hair began to get 710 00:40:34,920 --> 00:40:36,370 like straw. 711 00:40:36,830 --> 00:40:40,239 I was just recently working with another family who's daughter 712 00:40:40,240 --> 00:40:44,129 was going through the same thing and I kept telling them 713 00:40:44,130 --> 00:40:48,280 "your child is using drugs", and there was absolute denial. 714 00:40:49,300 --> 00:40:53,250 "I've suspicion that may be, but we can't prove that." 715 00:40:53,340 --> 00:40:55,969 "She keeps telling me, I've asked her, and she said" 716 00:40:55,970 --> 00:40:57,870 "absolutely not." 717 00:40:57,910 --> 00:41:00,899 Somebody called Chris and said, in the middle of Lance's 718 00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:03,939 worst part of his addiction, called her and said 719 00:41:03,940 --> 00:41:06,519 "Chris, what is Lance's drug of choice?" 720 00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:10,309 And Chris said "I was absolutely dumbfounded and I said" 721 00:41:10,310 --> 00:41:13,319 "tylenol?", and they said "No, I didn't mean that." 722 00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:16,799 "I mean his illegal drug of choice." And she said 723 00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:21,000 "I couldn't even hardly hear them," there was such denial. 724 00:41:22,940 --> 00:41:25,389 You said there's so much out there it's overwhelming. 725 00:41:25,390 --> 00:41:28,239 Most of us don't know where to begin, don't you have 726 00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:31,619 some information on your website that can give people... 727 00:41:31,620 --> 00:41:34,959 I will send anybody anything on any drug, on any type 728 00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,819 of recovery, for sex, workaholism, drugs, 729 00:41:37,820 --> 00:41:41,720 alcohol, all the latest stuff, ecstacy, club drugs, 730 00:41:42,020 --> 00:41:45,809 so I will send them anything, www.truestep.org is my website 731 00:41:45,810 --> 00:41:49,350 and you can ask for anything and I will send it. 732 00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:53,510 You can put "drug intervention", type it into your 733 00:41:53,540 --> 00:41:57,660 search program and it will give you tones of stuff. 734 00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,229 Online you can find amazing information. 735 00:42:00,230 --> 00:42:03,169 Let me give you that because she speaks so slowly 736 00:42:03,170 --> 00:42:09,490 you might have missed it. 737 00:42:09,530 --> 00:42:15,060 It's www.truestep.org. 738 00:42:15,090 --> 00:42:20,550 So, www.truestep.org. 739 00:42:20,590 --> 00:42:23,729 Right, and there's something else that different ministries 740 00:42:23,730 --> 00:42:26,269 will do, or different people will do, we've actually 741 00:42:26,270 --> 00:42:28,769 gone out to houses and do interventions, where you sit 742 00:42:28,770 --> 00:42:31,169 down with the family and you tell them. 743 00:42:31,170 --> 00:42:34,009 Tell them what you're afraid of, you encourage people 744 00:42:34,010 --> 00:42:36,739 to speak the truth to the addict, in stage 3 the addict 745 00:42:36,740 --> 00:42:39,619 will not hear you, but until they get to that stage 746 00:42:39,620 --> 00:42:42,469 they will hear you. Even in stage 3 you're still 747 00:42:42,470 --> 00:42:45,719 planting seeds, so you do an actual intervention. 748 00:42:45,720 --> 00:42:48,209 Having one addict talking to another one and me looking 749 00:42:48,210 --> 00:42:50,319 right into their face, or somebody like me looking 750 00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:54,530 in their face saying: "You are losing everything" and giving 751 00:42:54,910 --> 00:42:56,019 that truth to them. 752 00:42:56,020 --> 00:42:59,819 We did a structured intervention with my sister and we got 753 00:42:59,820 --> 00:43:02,919 her into a drug recovery program, she actually 754 00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:06,159 went through 3 of them, and each time it was 755 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:09,559 a 30 day program and she would come out and within 756 00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:12,340 3-5 days she would be on drugs again. 757 00:43:12,960 --> 00:43:16,429 I just want to emphasize something that we mentioned 758 00:43:16,430 --> 00:43:19,859 earlier: getting clean, being drug free for 30 days... 759 00:43:19,860 --> 00:43:21,869 ...Is half of the first step. 760 00:43:21,870 --> 00:43:24,129 Did you catch that? It's not even the first step, 761 00:43:24,130 --> 00:43:26,230 it's half of the first step. 762 00:43:26,270 --> 00:43:28,419 What's really interesting is if you don't take an addict 763 00:43:28,420 --> 00:43:30,999 through the rest of the steps in your families, in your 764 00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:33,609 churches, in your community, then they will relapse, 765 00:43:33,610 --> 00:43:36,509 so the next step is to acknowledge that I am 766 00:43:36,510 --> 00:43:40,229 out of control, so I get clean, but then I say out loud 767 00:43:40,230 --> 00:43:42,799 "I am out of control. I need some help. " 768 00:43:42,800 --> 00:43:45,409 Reaching out for actual, real connections, 769 00:43:45,410 --> 00:43:47,809 not with any even or object, but with a person. 770 00:43:47,810 --> 00:43:49,449 "I need your help, will you help me?" 771 00:43:49,450 --> 00:43:51,679 So being able to do that with family or friends, 772 00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:54,609 or definitely the Body of Christ is being able to say 773 00:43:54,610 --> 00:43:56,909 "I need some help" is definitely a part of it, 774 00:43:56,910 --> 00:44:01,350 to look outside myself and find some meaning outside of myself. 775 00:44:05,130 --> 00:44:08,379 Alcoholics Anonymous was one of the first treatment modalities 776 00:44:08,380 --> 00:44:11,219 that got the attention of almost the world, as far as 777 00:44:11,220 --> 00:44:14,019 addictions, in 1935 because they started seeing addicts 778 00:44:14,020 --> 00:44:15,230 really get well. 779 00:44:15,270 --> 00:44:17,889 And the reason they get well is because there was community, 780 00:44:17,890 --> 00:44:20,989 there was 1 addict sharing hope with another one, they started 781 00:44:20,990 --> 00:44:24,049 to look outside themselves in the addiction and started to 782 00:44:24,050 --> 00:44:26,619 realize that there is a power greater than myself 783 00:44:26,620 --> 00:44:29,639 that will restore me to sanity, and there's nothing magical 784 00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:32,629 about AA, it's just that they did things that were right 785 00:44:32,630 --> 00:44:35,219 for addicts, and families can do that. 786 00:44:35,220 --> 00:44:38,469 Actually, the 12 steps of AA, if you're familiar with them, 787 00:44:38,470 --> 00:44:40,810 they all come from the Bible. 788 00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:42,330 Exactly. 789 00:44:45,350 --> 00:44:48,789 Let's say that in a church environment, or even in a home, 790 00:44:48,790 --> 00:44:52,319 once someone has gotten to that point, they've admitted they're 791 00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:55,889 out of control, if someone walks into our church and tells us 792 00:44:55,890 --> 00:45:00,190 "I'm a recovering drug addict", what can we do to help 793 00:45:00,220 --> 00:45:06,030 because how uncomfortable are they to be "normal people". 794 00:45:06,060 --> 00:45:08,160 So uncomfortable. 795 00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:11,560 I was an addict on the streets by age 13, 796 00:45:11,960 --> 00:45:14,379 At 23, when I came into the church. 797 00:45:14,380 --> 00:45:17,899 My family are addicts, and when I came into the church 798 00:45:17,900 --> 00:45:20,729 I didn't even know how to eat at a table with someone. 799 00:45:20,730 --> 00:45:23,489 I had not eaten dinner with someone, I didn't know 800 00:45:23,490 --> 00:45:26,939 how to deal with anything normal and I'm around normal folk. 801 00:45:26,940 --> 00:45:29,850 So anything you did was modelling to me. 802 00:45:29,980 --> 00:45:32,529 When somebody would say anything about friendship, that you are 803 00:45:32,530 --> 00:45:34,459 my friend, my palms would sweat because I didn't 804 00:45:34,460 --> 00:45:36,469 know how to do that, I didn't know how to trust. 805 00:45:36,470 --> 00:45:40,309 So as family members, as a community, church community, 806 00:45:40,310 --> 00:45:44,079 any of that, is to realize that your role is to show them 807 00:45:44,080 --> 00:45:47,809 everything; how to laugh without it being a sadistic kind of 808 00:45:47,810 --> 00:45:51,019 laugh, how to communicate, how to have small talk. 809 00:45:51,020 --> 00:45:53,079 When somebody would sit across the table 810 00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,649 and eat with me, I would think "Do I look at them chew?" 811 00:45:55,650 --> 00:45:58,139 "Do I look at the table?" "Do I look at my feet?" 812 00:45:58,140 --> 00:46:01,799 I had no idea; Why do you talk about just the weather? 813 00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:04,439 And I had no idea that for normal people, the weather, 814 00:46:04,440 --> 00:46:07,039 talking about that kind of stuff is just getting to feel 815 00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,579 each other out and being normal. 816 00:46:08,580 --> 00:46:11,019 And I wanted to talk about my last suicide attempt, 817 00:46:11,020 --> 00:46:14,689 and they're like "Whoa!", so it's like being able to model 818 00:46:14,690 --> 00:46:16,570 appropriate communication. 819 00:46:16,670 --> 00:46:19,099 If we did that as a body of Christ, if we understood 820 00:46:19,100 --> 00:46:21,679 we're doing this for the very life of the person, 821 00:46:21,680 --> 00:46:23,969 we would bless them beyond what you could imagine, 822 00:46:23,970 --> 00:46:26,889 and we would bless ourselves. There's a reason why we need 823 00:46:26,890 --> 00:46:29,749 to be well and a reason why we need to model that. 824 00:46:29,750 --> 00:46:33,189 People would just flock to us if we could just do that. 825 00:46:33,190 --> 00:46:38,020 Ivan, for you a great part of your recovery was coming 826 00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:41,579 to this church and beginning to do the Bible studies with 827 00:46:41,580 --> 00:46:44,839 these men, did they do some role modelling for you 828 00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:48,220 and help you? What was the most effective part, 829 00:46:48,240 --> 00:46:51,640 besides the spiritual knowledge you were getting, 830 00:46:52,430 --> 00:46:55,499 working with the other men began to change your life? 831 00:46:55,500 --> 00:46:59,960 I would say the biggest thing was that when somebody's 832 00:46:59,990 --> 00:47:02,399 new to Christ and they're studying the word, 833 00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:03,800 they have questions. 834 00:47:04,530 --> 00:47:08,360 It didn't matter what question I had, they would say 835 00:47:08,390 --> 00:47:10,459 "Well, let's see what the Bible says." 836 00:47:10,460 --> 00:47:14,360 They would open the book and the answers are in there. 837 00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:18,499 I don't care what the question is, the answer is in there. 838 00:47:18,500 --> 00:47:19,240 Amen. 839 00:47:19,510 --> 00:47:22,369 But I have to say Ivan, too, that what doesn't 840 00:47:22,370 --> 00:47:25,799 get seen a lot is just the interaction with asking someone 841 00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:27,849 for help and getting the help. 842 00:47:27,850 --> 00:47:31,199 There's a healing process that happens there, just being 843 00:47:31,200 --> 00:47:34,149 able to sit down with a live person, rather than an 844 00:47:34,150 --> 00:47:37,459 inanimate object, a substance, or the addiction. 845 00:47:37,460 --> 00:47:40,969 So any communication that you do with an addict during that part 846 00:47:40,970 --> 00:47:43,289 of the recovery, will keep them in recovery. 847 00:47:43,290 --> 00:47:46,569 This is a stat the most people don't know, and I was shocked 848 00:47:46,570 --> 00:47:49,289 to hear it, but as sex offenders, somebody that is 849 00:47:49,290 --> 00:47:53,119 acting out a lot, establishes a friend with one person, 850 00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:56,029 a real friendship, not a token friendship, a real friendship 851 00:47:56,030 --> 00:47:59,449 with 1 person, the recidivism rate for them acting out 852 00:47:59,450 --> 00:48:01,670 drops 98%. 853 00:48:01,710 --> 00:48:05,049 98%, and that is with an addiction that is difficult 854 00:48:05,050 --> 00:48:07,059 to control, and so you're talking about 855 00:48:07,060 --> 00:48:10,079 any other addiction, we can act as a body of Christ, 856 00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:13,029 and the Bible backs us up, we will heal each other. 857 00:48:13,030 --> 00:48:16,019 Confess one to another, pray for each other that you may 858 00:48:16,020 --> 00:48:19,319 be healed, and it's an amazing process, but if I think 859 00:48:19,320 --> 00:48:22,099 it's just about stopping the drugs, I'm never going to help 860 00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:24,999 that person get well, it's about walking with them now. 861 00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:28,129 Because you've got to uproot whatever the cause was. 862 00:48:28,130 --> 00:48:29,880 Right, and relearn stuff. 863 00:48:30,420 --> 00:48:33,069 Well coming up next we're going to be taking some questions 864 00:48:33,070 --> 00:48:36,450 from our live audience, so please stay with us. 865 00:48:41,310 --> 00:48:42,869 Are you, or someone you love, struggling 866 00:48:42,870 --> 00:48:45,099 with drugs or alcohol? Do you sometimes wonder 867 00:48:45,100 --> 00:48:48,519 if there is hope? If so, we have just the book for you. 868 00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,619 Be encouraged as you read the promises that God 869 00:48:50,620 --> 00:48:53,749 has given in His word. Call or write today for your free gift 870 00:48:53,750 --> 00:48:56,229 of "God's promises" for your every need. 871 00:48:56,230 --> 00:48:57,507 You can write to us at: 872 00:48:57,611 --> 00:49:01,711 Up Close, PO Box 220 West Frankfort, IL 62896 873 00:49:01,760 --> 00:49:03,569 Or call during regular business hours: 874 00:49:03,570 --> 00:49:10,286 1-800-752-3226 or 618-627-4651 875 00:49:18,160 --> 00:49:22,240 Welcome back to Up Close. We're talking about how to 876 00:49:22,280 --> 00:49:25,989 escape from drug and alcohol addiction, and we're now going 877 00:49:25,990 --> 00:49:30,040 to be taking some questions from our live audience. 878 00:49:30,330 --> 00:49:33,029 So if you will, please, thank you for coming up. 879 00:49:33,030 --> 00:49:36,069 Tell us what you're name and your question is. 880 00:49:36,070 --> 00:49:39,169 Hello, my name is John Cayler, my question is 881 00:49:39,170 --> 00:49:42,879 if there is a key in helping keep people out of addiction 882 00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:46,500 after having been addicted, what would that key be? 883 00:49:47,670 --> 00:49:50,479 The key is finding meaning outside yourself. 884 00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:53,349 Addicts are so self focused. Everything is about finding 885 00:49:53,350 --> 00:49:55,969 release of pain, or pleasure for myself. 886 00:49:55,970 --> 00:49:59,660 So finding a purpose, when AA uses a higher power, 887 00:49:59,700 --> 00:50:02,569 that I can turn it over to God, I can look at something 888 00:50:02,570 --> 00:50:05,459 that's bigger than myself, I can even say my purpose 889 00:50:05,460 --> 00:50:08,479 is to let people know that recovery is possible, 890 00:50:08,480 --> 00:50:12,299 and so the purpose is bigger than what the addictive draw was 891 00:50:12,300 --> 00:50:17,790 Then I start getting reinforced by people that get into recovery 892 00:50:17,820 --> 00:50:20,270 because of something, we share it. 893 00:50:20,620 --> 00:50:22,969 So the key is finding meaning outside yourself, 894 00:50:22,970 --> 00:50:26,349 and stop being so self focused, and that's so hard for addicts 895 00:50:26,350 --> 00:50:28,450 because "it's all about me." 896 00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:33,229 Just to add to that, I think that really, an intimate 897 00:50:33,230 --> 00:50:36,899 relationship with God, if we don't try to practice religion 898 00:50:36,900 --> 00:50:40,559 but if we really come to know God as a loving Father 899 00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:44,780 and someone who is intimately involved and concerned about 900 00:50:44,810 --> 00:50:49,000 every detail of our life, if we see Him that way, I think 901 00:50:49,030 --> 00:50:52,009 that'll really help us. We begin to understand what 902 00:50:52,010 --> 00:50:56,430 2 Corinthians 12:9 says "His grace is sufficient, His power" 903 00:50:56,530 --> 00:50:58,559 "is made perfect in our weakness." 904 00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:00,949 We've learned to depend totally upon Him. 905 00:51:00,950 --> 00:51:02,030 Amen. 906 00:51:02,130 --> 00:51:05,039 Well, hello, thank you for coming. What's your name 907 00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:05,829 and your question. 908 00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:09,210 My name's [?], and my question is 909 00:51:09,550 --> 00:51:13,459 how can you tell if one of your friends that you don't know 910 00:51:13,460 --> 00:51:17,700 very well, is having drug abuse? 911 00:51:19,070 --> 00:51:21,459 When I can tell when somebody's using is all of a sudden 912 00:51:21,460 --> 00:51:23,749 they'll be happy, then they'll be angry, then they'll 913 00:51:23,750 --> 00:51:25,999 be irritated, then they'll want to go do something, 914 00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:28,789 they're going from one thing to another. 915 00:51:28,790 --> 00:51:31,959 Or their interests change radically, and those kind 916 00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:35,510 of things, so usually it's a change in behaviour. 917 00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:40,099 If you're saying in your gut "Something is not quite right", 918 00:51:40,100 --> 00:51:42,839 trust your gut, it's probably not right and there's something 919 00:51:42,840 --> 00:51:45,415 going on. To check it out just says 920 00:51:45,450 --> 00:51:47,829 what an incredible friend you are, if you came up to me 921 00:51:47,830 --> 00:51:50,169 and said "Cheri, I really like you and I'm starting to get" 922 00:51:50,170 --> 00:51:52,799 "to know you, but you know you're all over the place." 923 00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:55,259 Being able to check it out is incredible. 924 00:51:55,260 --> 00:51:58,089 Sometimes you can stop an addictive process right in 925 00:51:58,090 --> 00:52:00,889 the beginning of an addiction if somebody is just able 926 00:52:00,890 --> 00:52:02,899 to talk about what's happening. 927 00:52:02,900 --> 00:52:03,890 Good question. 928 00:52:03,910 --> 00:52:05,620 Yes, very good question. 929 00:52:05,890 --> 00:52:08,459 Hi, welcome to the program, please tell us your name 930 00:52:08,460 --> 00:52:09,419 and your question. 931 00:52:09,420 --> 00:52:12,610 Hilary Washington. My father has been 932 00:52:12,640 --> 00:52:15,800 involved with drugs ever since he was 18. 933 00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:20,469 He was a drug dealer at first, it was easy money for him 934 00:52:20,470 --> 00:52:23,599 and then he became addicted and he's been addicted 935 00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:26,669 for the past 20 years. He's been in and out of prison 936 00:52:26,670 --> 00:52:31,670 and he acknowledges his problem, but he always seems to go back. 937 00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:36,080 What can I do, physically, because I've prayed, 938 00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:40,710 all of our family for the past 20 years, but it doesn't seem... 939 00:52:41,430 --> 00:52:43,839 A lot of the times relapse happens with an addict 940 00:52:43,840 --> 00:52:47,350 7-8 times before they get it right. 941 00:52:47,550 --> 00:52:50,019 So sometimes going back is part of the process 942 00:52:50,020 --> 00:52:53,219 for some people, but also a lot of times with people 943 00:52:53,220 --> 00:52:55,989 that we love, we think that stopping the drug, 944 00:52:55,990 --> 00:52:59,379 or stopping the alcohol is the answer, and it's not. 945 00:52:59,380 --> 00:53:02,719 He has to learn. That neurochemistry that he got 946 00:53:02,720 --> 00:53:05,989 way out of whack has to establish itself again, 947 00:53:05,990 --> 00:53:08,699 and that all takes time. With some people that are in 948 00:53:08,700 --> 00:53:11,599 severe addictions, and I know that this is not a popular 949 00:53:11,600 --> 00:53:14,779 belief for some, but with severe addictions you actually need 950 00:53:14,780 --> 00:53:17,929 to take some anti depressants that will kick up your seratonin 951 00:53:17,930 --> 00:53:20,699 levels so that you feel like living during the time 952 00:53:20,700 --> 00:53:24,930 that you are relearning how to function again. 953 00:53:25,110 --> 00:53:27,149 So with a severe addict their neurochemistry 954 00:53:27,150 --> 00:53:32,030 is so suppressed that you need some intervention. 955 00:53:32,160 --> 00:53:35,779 With your dad, I want to say for one, I will join you 956 00:53:35,780 --> 00:53:39,550 in prayer with him, and don't give up on him, ever! 957 00:53:40,150 --> 00:53:42,819 Well Cheri, we have about 2 minutes that I'd like to get 958 00:53:42,820 --> 00:53:45,120 some final thoughts from you. 959 00:53:45,220 --> 00:53:49,249 One thing I was interested in, what are the stages of recovery? 960 00:53:49,250 --> 00:53:52,339 Stages of recovery are first to admit that I am powerless, 961 00:53:52,340 --> 00:53:56,330 I can't do this, I am a mess, my life is not working. 962 00:53:56,470 --> 00:53:59,009 The first stage is the acknowledgement of that. 963 00:53:59,010 --> 00:54:00,999 A lot of times, the first stage happens when somebody's 964 00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:02,979 in prison, they're sitting there and they're thinking 965 00:54:02,980 --> 00:54:06,609 "I think this is not working", it's like "Well hello!" 966 00:54:06,610 --> 00:54:10,650 The next stage is somebody intervening and introducing you 967 00:54:10,820 --> 00:54:13,949 to your own spirituality, and some people hate to say that 968 00:54:13,950 --> 00:54:16,849 is God or whatever, but to God Himself, and being able 969 00:54:16,850 --> 00:54:19,779 to realize that there is something outside myself. 970 00:54:19,780 --> 00:54:23,689 I can start establishing trust in you because I can't trust me. 971 00:54:23,690 --> 00:54:27,170 Another thing is to have a really conscious 972 00:54:28,110 --> 00:54:30,789 skepticism about your own understanding; 973 00:54:30,790 --> 00:54:33,370 don't lean on it, don't trust it. 974 00:54:33,410 --> 00:54:36,519 I do not know how to think yet, and I may never, 975 00:54:36,520 --> 00:54:38,519 so I'm going to lean on people around me. 976 00:54:38,520 --> 00:54:41,199 I'm going to lean on you as my friend, I'm going to lean 977 00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:44,419 on my family, people in church, the men that are ministering 978 00:54:44,420 --> 00:54:47,599 to me, I'm going to lean on God Himself, I'm not going to at all 979 00:54:47,600 --> 00:54:50,119 think that I can figure this out because I can't. 980 00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:52,729 So it's like being able to start looking at all those things: 981 00:54:52,730 --> 00:54:54,729 "I need to start doing the nutrition thing." 982 00:54:54,730 --> 00:54:56,689 "I need to start putting water in my body, 983 00:54:56,690 --> 00:54:59,509 "good stuff in my body. I need to start sleeping." 984 00:54:59,510 --> 00:55:02,809 An addict is never to be too tired, too hungry, or too angry. 985 00:55:02,810 --> 00:55:05,129 All those kind of things all relapse, 986 00:55:05,130 --> 00:55:09,250 so the first stages are just learning all those things. 987 00:55:09,550 --> 00:55:12,159 Once you get into the next stage of recovery is you 988 00:55:12,160 --> 00:55:15,659 finally get it; there's meaning in my life outside myself. 989 00:55:15,660 --> 00:55:19,119 "I care about you!" and all of a sudden the addict looks 990 00:55:19,120 --> 00:55:22,860 up and says "I care about you. I'm glad Amanda's" 991 00:55:22,890 --> 00:55:25,199 "in recovery. I'm glad that she's learning" 992 00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:27,459 "to love her children." Those kind of things that her 993 00:55:27,460 --> 00:55:30,249 husband is in recovery, that they have a life. 994 00:55:30,250 --> 00:55:32,329 As an addict I'm not glad about that at all 995 00:55:32,330 --> 00:55:34,349 unless that's somehow going to benefit me. 996 00:55:34,350 --> 00:55:37,919 When I'm in the next stage in recovery, I am truly glad 997 00:55:37,920 --> 00:55:40,199 for someone else. So you can start telling 998 00:55:40,200 --> 00:55:43,029 where an addict is in recovery by those things. 999 00:55:43,030 --> 00:55:46,289 The last stage is not only am I glad for her, but I want 1000 00:55:46,290 --> 00:55:49,509 to see if I can help in any way, so I actually start 1001 00:55:49,510 --> 00:55:51,689 reaching out to make a difference in my family, 1002 00:55:51,690 --> 00:55:54,179 in the community around me, in my church 1003 00:55:54,180 --> 00:55:58,380 and I feel like I'm actively a part of the human race, 1004 00:55:58,410 --> 00:56:00,519 which I didn't feel in my addiction. 1005 00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:02,789 Praise God. I just want to thank you so much 1006 00:56:02,790 --> 00:56:05,689 for being here today, it has been such a pleasure. 1007 00:56:05,690 --> 00:56:09,959 I also want to thank our guests, Amanda Hultz and Ivan Morfit, 1008 00:56:09,960 --> 00:56:13,170 thank you for sharing your testimony with us. 1009 00:56:14,440 --> 00:56:17,829 As I've been sitting here, the scripture that keeps coming 1010 00:56:17,830 --> 00:56:22,910 to my mind tonight is Acts 26:18. 1011 00:56:23,310 --> 00:56:28,670 This is what Jesus told Paul, and Paul is sharing this, 1012 00:56:30,110 --> 00:56:35,680 Christ told him: "I am sending you to them to open their eyes" 1013 00:56:35,710 --> 00:56:38,539 "that they may turn from darkness to light," 1014 00:56:38,540 --> 00:56:42,439 "and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may" 1015 00:56:42,440 --> 00:56:46,280 "receive forgiveness and release from their sins," 1016 00:56:46,510 --> 00:56:51,370 "and a place and a portion among those who are consecrated" 1017 00:56:51,670 --> 00:56:55,960 "by faith in Me. " Jesus really is the answer 1018 00:56:56,000 --> 00:57:00,260 and His power is made perfect in our weakness. 1019 00:57:00,410 --> 00:57:04,010 So I pray that you will put your trust in Jesus, 1020 00:57:04,190 --> 00:57:07,339 don't ever underestimate the power of prayer, 1021 00:57:07,340 --> 00:57:10,729 but we've got to all be educated and do some very 1022 00:57:10,730 --> 00:57:12,249 practical things as well. 1023 00:57:12,250 --> 00:57:15,320 Thank you for joining us tonight.